LOVING BASE CAMP
The following quotes from her book is an example of how thorough she is in teaching the proper role of a woman. UC love to quote Father saying how women are to lift up and raise men. Mrs. Andelin explains how women can inspire their husbands to reach success in every area of life. The best way to do this is to create a nurturing atmosphere in the home. When a woman creates a loving base camp then the man can go out and climb to the top. No woman can do this if she earns, worries about or invests money. When a woman works she demoralizes her man even if he says he isn't. It is like welfare. When an able-bodied man takes welfare from the state or from his wife, it crushes and cripples his spirit and therefore decreases the love a family should feel in their home and it weakens the nation. Those sisters who work and say they love their job and that it contributes to society are only mouthing feminist leaders and not speaking from their heart. The ideal world will have a high atmosphere because men and women will be in order. Helen Andelin writes:
Peaceful Home Atmosphere
Provide a peaceful home atmosphere. When things are right at home your husband can think more clearly, and will be renewed in body and spirit, prepared to go back into the world to make another effort. When his home life is on an even keel he's more apt to succeed in his work.
The Wife's Budget
A simple solution to common money problems is the wife's household budget, which covers food, clothing, household goods, personal items, or anything in regular demand. It should not include occasional things such as furniture, appliances, major household repairs, or remodeling. The budget should be advanced weekly or monthly. It should be a fair 'allowance, based on the husband's income, but hopefully generous enough to have some left over. This you should be allowed to keep, to save or to spend as you please, with no questions asked. This provides personal freedom and incentive to be thrifty.
Your husband should manage the rest of the money, paying the monthly bills such as gas, electricity, telephone, water, house payments, insurance, yard care, car expense, income taxes, and other expenses. As for furniture, household equipment, and other items not in the regular budget, work this out together, conscious of living within your income. If he manages his money well and accumulates an excess, although you are entitled to discuss its use, he should have the major jurisdiction and final say. This will provide him with incentive to be diligent in his work and increase his income.
When he contemplates spending a considerable amount of money from his savings for investments, he should consult you, but it's bad policy to make this a binding obligation. Disputes over money matters are a source of painful problems in marriage. Whatever you gain by having more control is lost in a dampened relationship. Try to understand that a man works hard for his money, and it's wise to allow him freedom over his excess, as long as you are not deprived of what you need.
In Times Of Financial Distress:
In periods of financial difficulty, when there never seems to be enough money to cover expenses, instead of getting a job as most women are inclined to do, consider the following:
1. Reduce Expenses: Review monthly expenses with your husband, such as house payments, utilities, car expense, insurance, music lessons, food, clothing, and anything else which you must pay for on a regular basis. Cut expense wherever possible. You may think this can't be done, but with a little thought it probably can. Selling one car may be possible, and could turn your situation around. Difficult as this may seem, it is not so difficult as the oppression of worry.
2. Trim the Luxuries: Next, trim the comforts and luxuries more drastically, so you are living well within your husband's income, with something to spare for savings. You may find it hard to forgo luxuries in a world that entices your desire in every conceivable way. Clever advertisements tempt us to buy the latest models in household equipment, furnishings, and even a bigger and better house. This desire is enhanced by an awareness that other families have them. Although these material things bring convenience, comfort, and pleasure, they don't compare to the peace which comes from living within your income. Many small luxuries, too, increase expenses. Make a list of them and see how many you can forgo.
Problems in Family Finances
1. Confusion of Roles: The problem in our society is that some men and women have their financial roles confused. A man may think his only duty is to provide the living. He brings home his paycheck, hands it over to his wife, and expects her to manage the money. She pays the bills and worries about where the next dollar is coming from.
If, through her initiative, she is able to save part of the income, what happens? Her husband, as the leader in full command, reaches into the savings and spends the money for luxuries or investments. It would be different if he managed the money and worried about it. He would then have more right to use the excess money according to his best judgment, but not otherwise. The role of money management and control of the purse strings belong inseparably together. If the wife manages the money and worries about it, she should have the power of decision in investing it, or spending it.
There is further confusion of roles with women working to help provide the living. Because they are so busy working and worrying about finances, they neglect home duties. Their homes are in such a state of confusion that when the man comes home he doesn't have the peace he needs to revive himself. No wonder he has difficulty solving his money problems or making greater strides in his work.
Because women spend so much time away from home working, they learn extravagant habits of spending to save time. Food, clothes, and household goods are bought to save time rather than money. Fast disappearing is the womanly art of thrift, which is such a feeling of security to a family. What is the solution to these common problems we see in our society? The answer is to recognize financial roles and live accordingly.
2. Stress for the Wife: Serious problems can occur when the wife manages the money. For example, a man brought his paycheck home each week and handed it to his wife. She managed it well until several more children came along. It became increasingly difficult for her to cover expenses, causing her considerable stress and worry. In the meantime, her husband was quite carefree about money matters. She tried to explain their problems but be was not used to thinking about them.
The man was offered a higher-paying position in another state. When the husband and wife considered the proposition, the wife wanted him to accept the position to solve financial problems, but the husband saw no reason to do so. He preferred to stay in his comfortable environment. Because he was not managing the money be did not feel the financial pinch. This was not fair. When a man forfeits his position as money manager, he should also forfeit his power of decision over money.
Women were not designed to worry about money. They become depressed, lose sparkle and charm, and sometimes even become mentally and physically ill. They worry more intensely about money than men because, not being the breadwinner, they are helpless to increase the income. Of course they can go to work, but in so doing increase problems. Men worry about money, too, but they have more temperament for it and can do more about it. If they don't have enough money -they can work a little harder to increase their income.
Some women take over financial management by choice or even by demand. This is usually because they don't trust their husbands to do a good enough job, or think they can do better. But even if the wife assumes this role by choice, there are losses to Her. Being an efficient money manager can burden her with responsibility which can interfere with her domestic role. And if she becomes capable as a financier, it can mean a loss of womanliness.
3. When a Man Makes a Mess of Things: How would you handle this problem? Suppose you 'have been handling the money all along, then suddenly decide to give the job to your husband, trusting him to handle things. He willingly accepts and you peacefully turn your back on this part of your life. What if he makes a mess of things, gets behind in the house payments, doesn't pay the bills, overdraws the bank account, and a few other things? You are a nervous wreck. You don't want the job back, but what can you do? If you have this situation, try the following:
Let go more completely and turn your back on things. 'Don't be on the anxious seat, checking the books to see if he added right, or is neglecting anything. If he makes a mess of things let him suffer the consequences, no matter what they are. This is the only way he will learn.
Remember, if you have been handling the money, he has been denied experience and will have to learn by doing. Also, if you let go completely, the psychology is right. He will begin to feel responsible, to know that if anyone is to worry about the money, it will have to be him. And he will notice your relief, that you are happier. Let him know you are. As he sees you brighter he will try harder to make a go of things, to keep you happy.
The big lie that is repeated over and over in America is that women can have it all. Hollywood brainwashes everyone through TV and movies that feminism is the truth. In the popular movie Groundhog Day the superstar actress Andie McDowell is asked what she wants in life. She says something like, "I suppose I want what everyone wants -- marriage, children and a career." By the end of the movie she fornicates with the male star. UC members and everyone else is blindsided by feminism. The forces of Satan are too beautiful and seductive and repeat their ideology so many times that is near impossible for anyone to see through it. Careers for women and fornication are sacred beliefs for the elite of America. UC members and everyone else fail to see that the two ideas go hand in hand. As more women leave the home, then more immoral society becomes. Women dominating men is the root cause of the fall of Adam and Eve and the root cause of the breakdown of the American family. In real life Andie McDowell has a career and children. She had a husband, but divorced him. The road of feminism is the road of women leaving their post and creating a hurting world of divorce and division. Hollywood loves to portray religious people as prudish, uptight, mean-spirited bigots.
Unificationists are no different than society in bashing males. Katie Couric can joke about castrating men on the Today Show and no one says a word. We are in the final battle for the mind, the family and the nation. Feminism is winning, but there are some voices for God such as the Southern Baptists who make the majority in and out of the UC want to throw up.
The Southern Baptists make up the nations largest Protestant denomination and have experienced some defections because of the denomination's conservative positions. President Jimmy Carter in 2000 publicly announced that he was cutting ties to the Southern Baptist Convention after struggling with what he calls its "increasingly rigid" creed. Its decision to bar women from being pastors and making a strong statement that women "submit graciously" to their husbands, upset Carter and his feminist wife, Rosalyn. Unificationists who argue with me always use the word "rigid" to dismiss me as unprincipled. These brothers and sisters denounce me and those in my family who stand up to their feminism as being without love and compassion. They are the compassion police. Dear Reader, don't listen to them.
Carter said, Im familiar with the verses they have quoted about wives being subjugated to their husbands. In my opinion, this is a distortion of scripture. I personally feel the Bible says all people are equal in the eyes of God. I personally feel that women should play an absolutely equal role in service of Christ in the church. Their stands "violate the basic premises of my Christian faith," Carter wrote.
He says, "I've made this decision with a great deal of pain and reluctance." Carter said he had been feeling increasingly uncomfortable and somewhat excluded from the church for years. The president of the 15.8 million-member Southern Baptist Convention, the Rev. James Merritt of Snellville, Ga., defended the denomination's positions and said of Carter's departure: "With all due respect to the President, he is a theological moderate. We are not a theological moderate convention." Merritt said his group isn't getting more conservative; American society is getting more liberal.
I realize I am a voice crying in the wilderness in the UC. There are very few voices against the feminism in the UC. Someday every member will hear that there is a cultural war in the UC and will have to struggle, as President and Mrs. Carter have, over whether old fashioned values are absolute or not. Either Cheryl Wetzstein and Marilyn Morris are right or I am right. When the UC becomes united against the feminism and publicly support the Southern Baptist positions and even go beyond them and say that only men should lead outside the family as well, is when UC brothers stop being wimps and spiritual sissies and give leadership to this lost nation.
Brothers need to stop feeling guilt for being men. They must stop thinking they are Lucifer and their wife is Eve and only Father is Adam. Unlike Adam in the Garden, they need to be true Adams and stand up to feminists. Adam should have taken responsibility and been strong in the Garden. Eve may have started the Fall, but Adam was given the divine position of her leader and should have helped her instead of giving in to her. It takes guts to stand up to feminists. Brothers need to confidently dominate with love. They must make rocking the cradle look good to women to counter Hollywood's propaganda that women are to rule the world in Congress instead of staying home and being an inspiration for her man to be successful. Brothers have been castrated and need to start dreaming big and being heroes. Father is not supposed to be the only hero for people.
The UC must publicly write a clear value statement and make the virtue of godly patriarchy the cornerstone of our beliefs. At the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints website (www.LDS.org) they write, "By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation."
They also write, "The father is the patriarch of the family and has important responsibilities that are his alone. He is the priesthood holder and has the duties of priesthood leadership. He should guide his family with humility and kindness rather than with force or cruelty. The scriptures teach that those who hold the priesthood should lead others by persuasion, gentleness, love, and kindness
"The father should spend time with each child individually. He should teach his children correct principles, talk with them about their problems and concerns, and counsel them lovingly.
"It is also the father's duty to provide for the physical needs of his family, making sure they have the necessary food, housing, clothing, and education."
When the UC makes an absolute stand for men being patriarchs at its website (www.Unification.org), then we will see some excitement in the UC. Feminism is junk ideology. Just as we shouldn't feed ourselves junk food, we shouldn't feed our mind with junk thoughts of feminism and socialism.
Feminism in America is so rampant that now women are swinging elections and getting socialists into office. Larry, the author of 10 Things You Cannot Say in America, said in a newspaper column that studies show women are less informed than men and vote more for big government. They are more emotional and see government as compassionate. Trying to be logical with most women does not work very well.
Elder says, "Why does the Democratic message of Big Government welfare-state 'soak the rich' socialism work? Nobel laureate economist Milton Friedman once said, 'The argument for collectivism is simple if false; it is an immediate emotional argument. The argument for individualism is subtle and sophisticated; it is an indirect rational argument.'
"So the Republicans face a dilemma in attracting female voters. Opposition to tax, spend, and regulate requires an understanding of the benefits of the free market, as well as the relationship between high taxes and low productivity. Republican opposition to regulation requires an understanding of the unintended negative consequences of government market interference."
"Democrats are betting that Republican opposition to the legislation on intellectual and philosophical grounds will serve only to anger voters in those groups," writes Investor's Business Daily's Peter Cleary. So, says Cleary, enlightening female voters turns them off!" I have seen UC sisters say they are conservative and then proceed to spout the feminist/socialist party line. They are totally unaware of their illogic. UC brothers are more conservative, but most of them are so beaten down they go along with the feminist agenda.
Of the Three Blessings, the most important is the Second. Father talks mostly about the restoration of Adam and Eve. I also want to focus on men/women relationships. Let me say a few words about the Third Blessing and then I will go back to elaborating on the Second Blessing.